I’m Taking It Back. For Our Sake… Pt. 2

*Quick follow up on Wednesday’s post- The remainder of the evening/ early morning went off without a hitch. The baby slept until 3:19 a.m. Then when he woke up we nursed. I took him with me to turn off his sister’s tank light. (It’s being used as a temporary nightlight.)  Then once I returned to our room I laid him back down. He let out a small whimper and then he was out again. Didn't hear from him until 6:30 a.m.! (Happy dance resembling the Cabbage Patch.) And so began Day 2.

Day 2 was not as tough as Day 1. For nap time I nursed and laid him down in his bed and left him. He only cried for 12 minutes this time before he was out. This nap was short lived. About 30 minutes later I heard crying. Poor thing sounded so stressed out. So I went in and rescued him.

Bedtime was a little different. I called it our “cheat night”. We had our bi-weekly family night at my brother’s house this week. Unfortunately, but fortunately, we weren’t home for the normal bedtime routine. When we got home my little man was asleep. All I had to do was change him. But instead while changing him I tried to wake him gently. We nursed briefly and in the bed he went. Just like before, he whimpered a bit then went back to sleep.

At about 2:30 – 3ish a.m. he woke up. I made an attempt to not pick him up at all. It was unsuccessful. He started to get a little loud so I picked him up so he wouldn’t wake his dad. This time we didn’t nurse. I rocked him, gave him his pacifier, and he went to sleep. Didn’t wake up until 6:30 a.m.! And then we welcomed Day 3.

Today, we went a slightly different route. I’m starting to feel a little bad about the trauma that the baby seems to be experiencing. I can’t even motion towards or lean over his bed without him bursting into hysterics. But I’m still trying to hang tough. Still trying to stay the course.

At naptime I took a slightly different approach with the same end goal in mind. As he approached exhaustion he began insisting on nursing himself to sleep. We nursed sitting in my bed and I talked to him and kissed his hands in a valiant effort to keep him awake. My attempt was successful. After he released me I moved him into his bed. This time the difference was I stayed with him. Once I laid him down I rubbed his legs to calm him as he approached anxiety. Then slowly but surely I began to back away from him. From his legs to leaning on the edge, from the edge to sitting on my bed close by, from the bed to the door. Every time I moved away he started to fuss. “No, no, no,” would get him to pull himself together.

Finally I made it out. That process took 15 minutes. But the result was minimal tears. At least I thought so. Once I walked out the door he started up the real drama. But the bright side was he did that for about 15 more minutes. (sigh) I should of just done that to begin with and saved myself valuable time. Oh well, lesson learned. Once again he slept for about 30 minutes before waking up right back in his fit.

Now, here’s where I learned a real lesson. I went in to him too soon. My mistake. I’ll have to test this theory to confirm. (Keep you posted). He didn’t realize that I was there. As I watched, slowly he began to try to go back to sleep. He was putting up a really good fight. Still crying and calling my name, he grabbed his elephant and lay back down. At that point I realized, “Dang!, I shoulda waited.” Sit up, lay down, cry, don’t cry… Until he finally realized I was there. He stopped crying. There we were looking at each other. For about five minutes neither one of us did anything. Then the drama continued…

I waited trying to not pick him up in the midst of the crying. I don’t want him to think that a tantrum will get him what he wants. It had escalated to the point that his cry was silent. After calming him off the ledge to just a cry I picked him up. Would you believe that he stopped immediately as though nothing had ever happened?! That little booger.

Remember, he was still sleepy. He laid his head down on my chest and I rocked him a bit. Then I had a bright idea! Let me climb my tail into his bed. At least try to get him to see that his bed is not the enemy. In we went. (Please keep in mind that his bed is a Pack n’ Play.) I sat with him and eventually made him lay down. He spread himself so both arms were on my legs and his legs were in my lap. In other words, I was not moving without him knowing about it. LOL.

I was able to slowly pull myself from underneath him while he wasn’t completely sleeping. As I moved he adjusted and drifted further. Eventually, he was asleep again.

Bedtime tonight was relatively easy. For whatever reason he was exhausted. I bathed him and attempted to nurse him. I guess since he just ate he wasn’t really interested. I gave him his pacifier, rocked him until his eyes began to roll. In the bed he went. I turned off all the lights accept an extremely dim night light. I rubbed his leg for a bit and then began the easing away. In about five minutes he was asleep and I was out! Mission complete!

I’m going to see what happens if I don’t go to him when he wakes up tonight. Stay tuned.

 Miracles & Blessings.

I’m Taking It Back. For Our Sake...

Today was the day. I decided that TODAY was the day that I take it back! For our sake. My bedroom for the last four years (I’m including pregnancy time with my daughter who is now 3 years old.) has been taken over by our children. And believe me when I say my relationship with my husband has suffered for it greatly. Yes, I decided to breastfeed both of my children. Yes, I decided cosleeping would be best to promote breastfeeding and bonding, not to mention the ease of just being able to roll over and plug in. No bottle making necessary. But, DANG! No one told me once I started that process it would take blood, sweat, and tears to reverse it.

Our daughter slept with us EVERY night. Then slowly but surely we decided that she had a lovely room and a nice bed that were not being used and it was time for her to move in. So the daunting process began. I had read many articles about making the change and attempted to put them into practice, but to no avail; at least not at first. The problem was we, my husband and I, were very inconsistent. We would always give in. Finally we saw light at the end of the tunnel and more and more she began to at first fall asleep and then eventually stay in her bed. At that point I think we heard angels singing. LOL.

Once we got pregnant though, something clicked in her. I think with all of the change she began to regress. But this time we weren’t havin’ it. Not again. So we told her she could not sleep  in  our bed, but could sleep in our room. So a little bed was made for her on the floor with her blanket and pillows. That seemed to work. Then she decided she would sleep in the Pack N’ Play since the now newborn baby was sleeping in our bed. She compromised (wink, wink).

Now, let me make myself clear. I had no intentions on restarting the process, but it just kinda happened. I tried to put him in the basinet, but he was too far away. I couldn’t see him…, you know how it goes. So I moved him in. And there he stayed. Now almost 10 months later I’m here… writing about how I’m reclaiming our space.

I made an attempt not long ago to put him in his bed for naptime. He screamed and cried for 20 mins. before losing the battle and knocking out.

This was the result of that battle. No, I didn't leave him like this.

Today though… Today was it. Something inside me clicked and I am ready. So at naptime I nursed him and placed him in his bed. With the support of a new friend, Dr. Kim (Check out her blog.) on Twitter, I was able to tough it out and let him cry. Back and forth she and I went. Thank goodness for her. After about the same 20 minutes he was out. I vowed that this was it! In order to not cause him any trauma we are gonna make this happen!

Battle #2. Me 2: Baby 0

Normally, at night, I nurse him in the side-laying position and eventually he detaches, turns over and goes totally to sleep. I let him stay there for a bit and then move him into his bed. Some time in the middle of the night we wakes and will not go back to sleep until he’s in our bed. Apparently our bed has some sort of drug within its fibers because he’s back to sleep before he even gets in good. And there he stays until morning.

Tonight was different. I prepared my husband and told him what the plan was. Explained that what ever he needed to cover the next 20 minutes or so he needed to grab because he could not go back into our room until the baby was asleep. And the process began. I nursed the baby as usual. But this time I nursed him sitting up. Once I was sure that he was done and ready to do the “turn over” I placed him in his bed with his pacifier. Poor thing. Before he could even touch down he began to cry. But I held strong and placed him down, turned on a very dim light and closed my bedroom door behind me. Yes, screeching my name did follow. He can be soooo pitiful. But, would you believe it only took him seven minutes to go down? So now the only thing left to work out is the middle of the night. I’ll have to keep you posted on that one.

Down for the count. 3:0, but who's counting. ;-)

Day 1 is complete! (Sorta)

Miracles & Blessings.