Friday, September 18, 2009

I’m Taking It Back. For Our Sake… Pt. 2

*Quick follow up on Wednesday’s post- The remainder of the evening/ early morning went off without a hitch. The baby slept until 3:19 a.m. Then when he woke up we nursed. I took him with me to turn off his sister’s tank light. (It’s being used as a temporary nightlight.)  Then once I returned to our room I laid him back down. He let out a small whimper and then he was out again. Didn't hear from him until 6:30 a.m.! (Happy dance resembling the Cabbage Patch.) And so began Day 2.

Day 2 was not as tough as Day 1. For nap time I nursed and laid him down in his bed and left him. He only cried for 12 minutes this time before he was out. This nap was short lived. About 30 minutes later I heard crying. Poor thing sounded so stressed out. So I went in and rescued him.

Bedtime was a little different. I called it our “cheat night”. We had our bi-weekly family night at my brother’s house this week. Unfortunately, but fortunately, we weren’t home for the normal bedtime routine. When we got home my little man was asleep. All I had to do was change him. But instead while changing him I tried to wake him gently. We nursed briefly and in the bed he went. Just like before, he whimpered a bit then went back to sleep.

At about 2:30 – 3ish a.m. he woke up. I made an attempt to not pick him up at all. It was unsuccessful. He started to get a little loud so I picked him up so he wouldn’t wake his dad. This time we didn’t nurse. I rocked him, gave him his pacifier, and he went to sleep. Didn’t wake up until 6:30 a.m.! And then we welcomed Day 3.

Today, we went a slightly different route. I’m starting to feel a little bad about the trauma that the baby seems to be experiencing. I can’t even motion towards or lean over his bed without him bursting into hysterics. But I’m still trying to hang tough. Still trying to stay the course.

At naptime I took a slightly different approach with the same end goal in mind. As he approached exhaustion he began insisting on nursing himself to sleep. We nursed sitting in my bed and I talked to him and kissed his hands in a valiant effort to keep him awake. My attempt was successful. After he released me I moved him into his bed. This time the difference was I stayed with him. Once I laid him down I rubbed his legs to calm him as he approached anxiety. Then slowly but surely I began to back away from him. From his legs to leaning on the edge, from the edge to sitting on my bed close by, from the bed to the door. Every time I moved away he started to fuss. “No, no, no,” would get him to pull himself together.

Finally I made it out. That process took 15 minutes. But the result was minimal tears. At least I thought so. Once I walked out the door he started up the real drama. But the bright side was he did that for about 15 more minutes. (sigh) I should of just done that to begin with and saved myself valuable time. Oh well, lesson learned. Once again he slept for about 30 minutes before waking up right back in his fit.

Now, here’s where I learned a real lesson. I went in to him too soon. My mistake. I’ll have to test this theory to confirm. (Keep you posted). He didn’t realize that I was there. As I watched, slowly he began to try to go back to sleep. He was putting up a really good fight. Still crying and calling my name, he grabbed his elephant and lay back down. At that point I realized, “Dang!, I shoulda waited.” Sit up, lay down, cry, don’t cry… Until he finally realized I was there. He stopped crying. There we were looking at each other. For about five minutes neither one of us did anything. Then the drama continued…

I waited trying to not pick him up in the midst of the crying. I don’t want him to think that a tantrum will get him what he wants. It had escalated to the point that his cry was silent. After calming him off the ledge to just a cry I picked him up. Would you believe that he stopped immediately as though nothing had ever happened?! That little booger.

Remember, he was still sleepy. He laid his head down on my chest and I rocked him a bit. Then I had a bright idea! Let me climb my tail into his bed. At least try to get him to see that his bed is not the enemy. In we went. (Please keep in mind that his bed is a Pack n’ Play.) I sat with him and eventually made him lay down. He spread himself so both arms were on my legs and his legs were in my lap. In other words, I was not moving without him knowing about it. LOL.

I was able to slowly pull myself from underneath him while he wasn’t completely sleeping. As I moved he adjusted and drifted further. Eventually, he was asleep again.

Bedtime tonight was relatively easy. For whatever reason he was exhausted. I bathed him and attempted to nurse him. I guess since he just ate he wasn’t really interested. I gave him his pacifier, rocked him until his eyes began to roll. In the bed he went. I turned off all the lights accept an extremely dim night light. I rubbed his leg for a bit and then began the easing away. In about five minutes he was asleep and I was out! Mission complete!

I’m going to see what happens if I don’t go to him when he wakes up tonight. Stay tuned.

 Miracles & Blessings.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I’m Taking It Back. For Our Sake...

Today was the day. I decided that TODAY was the day that I take it back! For our sake. My bedroom for the last four years (I’m including pregnancy time with my daughter who is now 3 years old.) has been taken over by our children. And believe me when I say my relationship with my husband has suffered for it greatly. Yes, I decided to breastfeed both of my children. Yes, I decided cosleeping would be best to promote breastfeeding and bonding, not to mention the ease of just being able to roll over and plug in. No bottle making necessary. But, DANG! No one told me once I started that process it would take blood, sweat, and tears to reverse it.

Our daughter slept with us EVERY night. Then slowly but surely we decided that she had a lovely room and a nice bed that were not being used and it was time for her to move in. So the daunting process began. I had read many articles about making the change and attempted to put them into practice, but to no avail; at least not at first. The problem was we, my husband and I, were very inconsistent. We would always give in. Finally we saw light at the end of the tunnel and more and more she began to at first fall asleep and then eventually stay in her bed. At that point I think we heard angels singing. LOL.

Once we got pregnant though, something clicked in her. I think with all of the change she began to regress. But this time we weren’t havin’ it. Not again. So we told her she could not sleep  in  our bed, but could sleep in our room. So a little bed was made for her on the floor with her blanket and pillows. That seemed to work. Then she decided she would sleep in the Pack N’ Play since the now newborn baby was sleeping in our bed. She compromised (wink, wink).

Now, let me make myself clear. I had no intentions on restarting the process, but it just kinda happened. I tried to put him in the basinet, but he was too far away. I couldn’t see him…, you know how it goes. So I moved him in. And there he stayed. Now almost 10 months later I’m here… writing about how I’m reclaiming our space.

I made an attempt not long ago to put him in his bed for naptime. He screamed and cried for 20 mins. before losing the battle and knocking out.

This was the result of that battle. No, I didn't leave him like this.

Today though… Today was it. Something inside me clicked and I am ready. So at naptime I nursed him and placed him in his bed. With the support of a new friend, Dr. Kim (Check out her blog.) on Twitter, I was able to tough it out and let him cry. Back and forth she and I went. Thank goodness for her. After about the same 20 minutes he was out. I vowed that this was it! In order to not cause him any trauma we are gonna make this happen!

Battle #2. Me 2: Baby 0

Normally, at night, I nurse him in the side-laying position and eventually he detaches, turns over and goes totally to sleep. I let him stay there for a bit and then move him into his bed. Some time in the middle of the night we wakes and will not go back to sleep until he’s in our bed. Apparently our bed has some sort of drug within its fibers because he’s back to sleep before he even gets in good. And there he stays until morning.

Tonight was different. I prepared my husband and told him what the plan was. Explained that what ever he needed to cover the next 20 minutes or so he needed to grab because he could not go back into our room until the baby was asleep. And the process began. I nursed the baby as usual. But this time I nursed him sitting up. Once I was sure that he was done and ready to do the “turn over” I placed him in his bed with his pacifier. Poor thing. Before he could even touch down he began to cry. But I held strong and placed him down, turned on a very dim light and closed my bedroom door behind me. Yes, screeching my name did follow. He can be soooo pitiful. But, would you believe it only took him seven minutes to go down? So now the only thing left to work out is the middle of the night. I’ll have to keep you posted on that one.

Down for the count. 3:0, but who's counting. ;-)

Day 1 is complete! (Sorta)

Miracles & Blessings.

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Our First Day of School…

September 14, 2009

Sitting here tonight reflecting on the event of the day… My little girl had her first day of school. I can’t believe how quickly time flies. Yes, it’s only Pre-K, but still. She’s my first baby.

I was so excited to wake her this morning. 6:30a I kissed her and sung her a little song that I made up when she was a baby. “Good morning. Good morning. Good morning to you. Good morning. Good morning. How do you do? Good morning. Good morning. Good morning to you. Good morning. Good morning. How do you doooooooo?!!!” Add in a few light tickles and you’ve got a smiling face when she actually comes to.

I explained what I expected from her this morning before her feet even touched the floor. We turned on one of our favorite cds “Car Ride Fun: Kids’ Sing-Along with Nikki Loney” Then we were off! Thank goodness I put my FlyLady habit of preparing for the morning before bed (BBR) into play. We were ready to FLY. Already bathed, we brushed teeth, washed face, pottied, dressed, brushed hair, and were ready to go without a single hiccup! Excellent morning!

To add to the awesomeness of the day my husband, her dad, took the morning off to be present for drop off and pick up! So we said a quick family prayer, left the house, dropped off the baby with my grandmother (you know, so we would be able to provide undivided attention.), and made it to school with time to spare. I signed her in, introduced her dad to her teacher, received a super cute name tag (an apple with her name on it), and we headed to class.

Once all the kids had arrived we walked in, found her hook, got her settled in, kisses and hugs, and said our “See ya later”s. As the teacher lined them all up to wash up for breakfast, I looked back as the door closed to hear, “Bye Mommy.” (My eyes are welling up as I remember. Silly, I know.)

Time for pick up…

Had to make sure we were early. I wanted to be there before they let out. I just didn’t want her to have to wait for me to arrive, or (gasp) be the last child to be picked up. So we made it. Not knowing what to do (remember this is my first day of school too! LOL) I went to her class and peeked in. The teachers aide asked me to wait at the front of the school. By that time other parents picking up and dropping off their little ones had collected at the designated area.

Here they came. Each child’s eyes lighting up as they saw their parent(s) waiting for them. It was so precious. Then…, there she was, beaming like the sun… my love. “Mommy!!!” You would have thought we had been separated for days. It was only three hours! I scooped her up. Kisses and hugs galore! I spoke to her teacher. Excellent reports all around.

As we walked to the car she told me about her day. They had breakfast (she had a bagel with “white cheese”), did arts & crafts (leaving blue glue on her pants), sang songs, got a tour around the classroom to see where they could play, and played. They didn’t get to play outside. Once we arrived at the car the story began again because her dad was in the car. Surprise, surprise! He asked her what she learned. At first she said, “nothing”, but then started listing off all of the basic rules that a classroom should have. She did, however, make sure to emphasize that you can not hug anyone unless you ask them first!

So day one went very well. She had a GREAT day. We will be back tomorrow.

Miracles & Blessings.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Let Us Remember...

Let us take a moment to remember all those lost on Sept. 11th. Not to be captivated by the sadness of that day, but to appreciate the selflessness of those who gave their lives to save a stranger. Say a prayer for the families who grieve their loses, yet continue to press on. 

Let us also not forget those who continue to lay their lives on the line and fight for our safety and freedoms everyday. And in that time of reflection and prayer please remember to send blessings and protection their way. It is these very moments that should make you grateful that you reside in this country. 
May God Bless the USA. 
Thank you Leylan for choosing to be one of those people. My Hero.
*I also want to take just a minute to remember a great man. My grandfather Barrie James Sweetland Mayo. May you rest in peace. He left this earth on Sept. 11, 1999 and still his memories live on. Papa, I miss you and love you still. 

Miracles & Blessings!

Homeward Bound...

I walked through my house this afternoon taking it all in, the different rooms and all of their possibilities. How my walls have no pictures and the décor leaves much to be desired. We still have newspaper taped on windows! I’m realizing that after living here for the last three years my house still doesn’t feel like a home. Yes, we live here, my children are growing up here, and we have a lot of great memories, but I don’t know. Something is still missing.

The hard part is while I desire that “home” feeling I know this is not my home. Not somewhere we will stay. My husband and I have actively begun looking for homes. So maybe in the back of my mind is where my hard time resides. I don’t want to put more into this house than necessary because I know it’s temporary. But in the meantime I’m need to be able to create a home atmosphere for my family and myself.

A challenge I’m facing is a very, very tight budget. We are operating on a single income and don’t have much wiggle room. What I need to learn is how to make my visions come alive with little to no money.

With the season about to change and the holidays fast approaching I find myself wanting to seize the opportunity to start fresh. Take this house and turn it into the home that we deserve. Create an atmosphere that captures the feelings these upcoming seasons invoke. All while reflecting our character, style and creating traditions for our relatively new family.

So here’s the plan…

I’m going to declutter (using, of course), clean, organize, repurpose, and decorate. The goal is to refocus the functions and purpose of this house, rid the CHAOS, and finally create our home. I’m going to start in one room and take on each one a little at a time. Which one, has yet to be decided. I’m thinking to start in the obvious place, the living room. However, there are seven spaces so stay tuned.

Miracles & Blessings!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Welcome to my world...

Yes, folks! Finally I've done it. I've got my own blog!!! (insert happy dance here) Now if I could just decide what I'm gonna write about I'd be good to go. Still have a lot of figuring out to do, but I'm game.

So, welcome. I hope you enjoy what you read. I pray as I make my way through this life I am able to share the many blessings given me. Yes, sometimes it's a little chaotic. Sometimes it's a bit, well... simply complicated. But hey, that's just me.

Miracles & Blessings!

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