Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I’m Taking It Back. For Our Sake...

Today was the day. I decided that TODAY was the day that I take it back! For our sake. My bedroom for the last four years (I’m including pregnancy time with my daughter who is now 3 years old.) has been taken over by our children. And believe me when I say my relationship with my husband has suffered for it greatly. Yes, I decided to breastfeed both of my children. Yes, I decided cosleeping would be best to promote breastfeeding and bonding, not to mention the ease of just being able to roll over and plug in. No bottle making necessary. But, DANG! No one told me once I started that process it would take blood, sweat, and tears to reverse it.

Our daughter slept with us EVERY night. Then slowly but surely we decided that she had a lovely room and a nice bed that were not being used and it was time for her to move in. So the daunting process began. I had read many articles about making the change and attempted to put them into practice, but to no avail; at least not at first. The problem was we, my husband and I, were very inconsistent. We would always give in. Finally we saw light at the end of the tunnel and more and more she began to at first fall asleep and then eventually stay in her bed. At that point I think we heard angels singing. LOL.

Once we got pregnant though, something clicked in her. I think with all of the change she began to regress. But this time we weren’t havin’ it. Not again. So we told her she could not sleep  in  our bed, but could sleep in our room. So a little bed was made for her on the floor with her blanket and pillows. That seemed to work. Then she decided she would sleep in the Pack N’ Play since the now newborn baby was sleeping in our bed. She compromised (wink, wink).

Now, let me make myself clear. I had no intentions on restarting the process, but it just kinda happened. I tried to put him in the basinet, but he was too far away. I couldn’t see him…, you know how it goes. So I moved him in. And there he stayed. Now almost 10 months later I’m here… writing about how I’m reclaiming our space.

I made an attempt not long ago to put him in his bed for naptime. He screamed and cried for 20 mins. before losing the battle and knocking out.

This was the result of that battle. No, I didn't leave him like this.

Today though… Today was it. Something inside me clicked and I am ready. So at naptime I nursed him and placed him in his bed. With the support of a new friend, Dr. Kim (Check out her blog.) on Twitter, I was able to tough it out and let him cry. Back and forth she and I went. Thank goodness for her. After about the same 20 minutes he was out. I vowed that this was it! In order to not cause him any trauma we are gonna make this happen!


Battle #2. Me 2: Baby 0

Normally, at night, I nurse him in the side-laying position and eventually he detaches, turns over and goes totally to sleep. I let him stay there for a bit and then move him into his bed. Some time in the middle of the night we wakes and will not go back to sleep until he’s in our bed. Apparently our bed has some sort of drug within its fibers because he’s back to sleep before he even gets in good. And there he stays until morning.

Tonight was different. I prepared my husband and told him what the plan was. Explained that what ever he needed to cover the next 20 minutes or so he needed to grab because he could not go back into our room until the baby was asleep. And the process began. I nursed the baby as usual. But this time I nursed him sitting up. Once I was sure that he was done and ready to do the “turn over” I placed him in his bed with his pacifier. Poor thing. Before he could even touch down he began to cry. But I held strong and placed him down, turned on a very dim light and closed my bedroom door behind me. Yes, screeching my name did follow. He can be soooo pitiful. But, would you believe it only took him seven minutes to go down? So now the only thing left to work out is the middle of the night. I’ll have to keep you posted on that one.

Down for the count. 3:0, but who's counting. ;-)

Day 1 is complete! (Sorta)

Miracles & Blessings.

3 comments:

  1. Way to go! I am also breastfeeding my son and the first week or so had in in our bed in one of those things made for a baby to sleep in but moved him to his crib. I nurse him and night and put him in his bed and as I work on the computer he will usually go to sleep. However four nights this week I have nursed him to sleep just to get some sanity. I do not want to get into the habit b/c I am scared it will be too hard to break. Not sure how long I'll nurse him. Longest I have ever nursed a baby is five months for various issues but this one is my last.... I'll probably drag it out...way out.

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  2. Wow! I'm so honored I could help. Your marriage DEFINITELY needs to come first; this helps the children, not hurts them. You know this; that's why you're doing it and soon everyone will be settled.

    Keep in touch...

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  3. Thanks ladies for the comments. I am very proud of us. Last nite went off without a hitch. He slept until 3:19a. Then when he woke up we nursed, turned of the only light keeping the house slightly lit and I laid him back down. A small whimper and then he was out again. Didn't hear from him til 6:30! (Happy dance)

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